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The King Speaks. The Coroner Specifies.

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Today, his Royal Highness King Slime returned from his vacation at Princess Minnie’s Castle. In a public statement issued by the crown’s spokesman, King Slime is quoted with saying:




“I am deeply saddened by the loss of Lady Slimenia. Her death came as a horrible shock. My slimey staff is working night and day to coordinate searches of the royal palace to apprehend whoever is responsible. I’ve read the full text of the coroner’s report, and there are many loose threads.



I want to assure you, my dear and loyal Slime Knights, that I am doing everything in my power to find out who did this, and I intend to punish them justly. I am still offering a handsome MM reward to any Slime who can shed some light on this gruesome case. Until the culprit is caught, I ask that you all be vigilant. Remember our dear Lady Slimenia, may she rest in peace, and cherish the fashion legacy she left us with.”



After this heart-felt announcement, the King agreed to waive royal law and allow the entirety of the coroner’s report to be made public. Here are the details:


“Lady Slimenia was found face-down in her nightgown, with a small, fake plastic crown found near her body. Though the crown had no unusual markings, it was exactly 1/8” smaller than the real crown worn by King Slime. The crown is being held in the Royal Guard’s office, along with all other evidence in this case.


On top of the plastic crown, a large ring with an opal set in a large metal pedestal was also found in her room. Though this ring originally seemed inconspicuous, after examining it more thoroughly, I have discovered a secret compartment behind the gemstone, which twists apart to conceal a powder. After testing this powder and doing a DNA analysis of Lady Slimenia's blood, the powder that was in the ring was also in Lady Slimenia’s body. The powder had the same key trace elements as the common Rennet powder, but this version has a more dangerous chemical property than its cheese-making cousin. The powder in question is a weakening agent that casts Kafuddle from the inside-out to confuse and weaken the victim, but it is not lethal on its own.


The rest of the crime scene was scoured, but there were no other clues to be garnered from the crime scene. Lady Slimenia’s body had no physical wounds, no fingerprints, and no abnormal markings of any kind.



Based on her facial expression and the lack of any physical marks, I deduce that Lady Slimenia died of total shock. I believe the poison was enough to weaken her enough so that whoever assailed this poor woman scared her so very much that she merely passed with the sheer terror of their presence. The attack was not physically violent in any way.”



Many questions have begun to surface in Slime Knights citizens' minds:

"Why did it take so long for King Slime to make an official statement?"

"Where is The Goddess in our time of need?"

"Who would do such a thing to Lady Slimenia?"



Since no culprit has yet been found, all Slime Knights are asked to be on highest alert. If you see something that appears suspicious, it is! Make sure to report it at once to the Royal Guards!





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